Love’s music, full of

Softness and peace.

Profound sadness of heart,

But joy in the listening.

Some sounds resonate in my heart and

Are notes to cherish and share.

Oftentimes an opening of feelings long buried.

As much in pain and sadness as in joy.

There is such a short distance between tears

Of joy and tears of pain that

They are sometimes confused,

One with the other.

Music brings out a depth of feeling, unexplainable,

Sometimes foreign, but always familiar.

To be able to make music is such a gift,

One that I surely do not possess!

But he does.  I hold his music close to my heart and feel the

Heartbeat of the music maker.

A writer and singer of soul and heart,

He speaks in sounds, notes rearranged in endless patters

With an ease that belies the complexity of the process.

Words of soul, love in notes, flowing beauty,

Softness of heart, eternity in each heartbeat.

You’re my poetry man, “you make things all-right”

Thank you

The silence of midnight

The silence of wanting.

Dark time, soft

With sadness.

A scent, a look, a memory,

Almost enough.

I long for that touch

That voice, that look.

It fills the night, turns the silence of longing

Into loving and giving.

The soft sadness replaced with his touch

His hand to hold.

His kiss to make mine

A light in the darkness but

Never to keep.

Soul searching,

What will I find?

The truth or just

My version of it.

What do i want from him?

For him to be what I want?

How unfair, how bizarre.

A stuffed animal in the corner

Would have as much soul,

one of my making.

Knotted ropes

slug round the edges.

Tethered to trees,

Tethered to hearts.

A mix of emotions,

Strong and weak.

Inappropriate in this need,

Soul grazing.

Fueling my heart,

But with false wants.

Irrational needs,

to  much to hope for.

I want it all, now

before it is too late

Before life is over and

I have lost.

The chances are over, nothing is left

I have missed it.

I want to love.

To love and be loved now.

I have waited far to long already,

But the hope fades

The darkness wins and

I am no more.

4/15

MC

Is he real or just a thought,

Just a beautiful thought.

A real flesh and blood man, or just my

Projection of what I have always hoped for.

Oh but real he is, my mind could not make this up.

It is beyond thought, beyond truth.

His eyes look into my soul

And carry me to places I have never been.

His kisses turn me inside out

And leave me breathless.

His hands hold my heart and

Caress my thoughts.

His sexual power is limitless,

And his lovemaking magical.

He is a man of spirit and light,

Kindness and love.

A talent and a gift with a

Soul of tenderness.

The world stands still when

We are together and time ceases to exist.

This way is my acceptance, my choice

My rules, and my sacrifice.

I can change my expectations,

But not my feelings.

There are some things that will never change,

Never cease to be a part of me, and my love for him is one of those things.

And what of that? Is it a sorry fate,

An overwhelming sadness, it could be but

It is not, instead it is a love with no bounds, no bonds, no limits, no lies, no guilt.

Just tenderness, and belief, a belief in each other and mutual respect.

I recently read a definition of the term relationship.  “A relationship is a heart searching for a home and longing looking for a place to be”.

My heart has been searching for years and has finally

found a home,

But the door is shut.

The longing can see in through the windows,

but they are all broken.

So I will accept this and will sit and hold my heart,

and cradle my longing, while waiting for time to stop again and

for his eyes to carry me to those places

where the door is always open, and the windows whole.