I am not ready…

Trust and not.

Abandonment, not fair.


Why am I punished again

For their mistakes?


For their inability to love,

To care, to be.


So much trouble,

Not worth the effort.


Or is it? I don’t know,

How will I know?


Will it change and become

Or stay more of the same.


More of the same seems

To be the means and ends.


More time spent in sorrow

Than in joy, must mean something.


A game, with no winners,

A love with no losers.


A pain with no beginning

And no end.


A familiar story,

A heart breaker.


But not mine,

My story is different.


The heartbreak starts my story and

The end never comes.


I don’t want it to,

But it has to.


I need

I want


I cannot wait any longer

The time is here


But I am not ready and so

The story continues.

6 thoughts on “I am not ready…

  1. Your pain is palpable. It makes me sad…so you hit the mark, with this. I used to think that too, why was I punished for the mistakes of those that went before. We had a long talk….Intimate talk. It was good. I hope you can find that space with your guy….it’s always a work in progress. Peace…Deb


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