What is different,
This time from the last?
Same hearts and souls.
Same bodies and minds.
But different intentions,
A shift in perspective, mine.
Needs are the same,
Wants the same too.
But the same love?
I am afraid to ask,
I don’t want to know.
The answer may
Destroy my illusions.
But this time there is no one to blame but me
As I am the only one who loves.
My heart and soul will have to survive with
Only as much as he freely gives, without question.
It was my choice,
My decision to make and I have made it.
My mind becomes good at hiding from itself and
Seeing only what it wants to believe.
A kind of sad resignation
Of what is and an acceptance
That this is all it will be.
Stolen moments when the world stands still.
When my heart joins with his and for those few hours
We are all that exist, all that matters.
And in that moment,
As he cradles my body and heart in his arms,
His eyes see through me to my soul
And he knows and understands.
Our connection is complete and
Nothing is more beautiful or more right.
But in the end, the morning always comes again and
With bad coffee and breakfast pie, he is gone.
The longing and loving and wanting begins anew
As if it had never been fulfilled.
Until the next time,
When the world stands still, again.